Adventure Site Contest 2: Owlbear Hill

​Written by Scott M.
AD&D, levels 5-7
Ruined dungeon in a hill.
  There’s a spot back in the woods they call Ol’ Bare Hill. Used to be a Chaos temple on top way back when, but then the Law came and knocked it down. We don’t go there…ever. These troubles that are going on…it’s that hill, I’m telling you.
  Semiotics are a funny thing. That incredibly flavorful little in-voice rumor starts us off in Owlbear Hill, where we hear about Ol’ Bare Hill, which the background informs us was probably originally “Olbert’s Hill”, given wicked King Olbert was buried there. Nominative determinism strikes hard with a mad wizard and his sleuth (points for correct collective name) of owlbears now in residence. It seems mild, but the simple wordplay grounds us in a world of folk realism at the outset. Tolkien approves, Scott M (of last year’s Etta Capp’s Cottage, for those curious).
  The Professor would not, most likely, approve of what comes next because once we descend the stairs down into the proper ruins we’re down, down to gonzo town. A zany laboratory filled with levers, machines (magical), and animal hybrids approaches the question of “who would make an owlbear” seriously. Story is one of several (or, as I suggest, ALL AT ONCE)….farmer slays a juvenile owlbear, locals freak out and offer cash to clear the hill, scribe values the “penfeathers” of the young owlbears, also gnolls wandering around hunting for animals but happy to murder gormless nearby shepherds. Solid hooks, presented naturalistically. Now go mess around inside the dungeon.
  Said dungeon’s map…now that’s a pretty map. Feel free to just spend a moment admiring it:

​  Okay, now that you’ve absorbed its visual charms, let’s analyze the content. Fifteen(ish) keys for a very tangled dungeon means there are rooms unkeyed. With a decent random encounter table this can work, but having a secret door with no content (north main dungeon) is going to lead to some miffed players. Up/down flow is nice, not exhaustive or obsessive, and loopy as the map is the main path is actually reasonably linear. Three entrances is good, with the ruin-stairs and the owlbear cave as the “main” two and a subtle poop-chute tunnel the “bonus” that leads to your players accusing you of unsavory motives. The lack of direct connection between the two sides of the lower dungeon is annoying, but the north bit really is more of a single-room diversion and a way to jump between sections of the main level. Making the top part cellars “C” and the lower part dungeon “D” is a pleasing letter sequence. Probably a little big for the scope, in the end.
  Each level of the dungeon is given a different environmental note, which is good, and it should be noted that there’s a very straightforward nerf to AOE spells in the cellars, with not only that those horrible sightlines but also the possibility that high damage collapses the ceiling. The traps in general are mostly naturalistic, with pits and chutes designed to dump the PCs into dangerous situations, a mimic masquerading as a door, and machines to mess around with leading to explosion or unleashed monsters. Good smooth integration.
  With a story all about hunting monsters and making hybrids, monsters are skewed into physical beatstick types, with the titular owlbears joined by gorillabears, boarhawks, scorpupines, wolfsnakes, porcupanthers, and landshark (young bulette)…you’ve got some freaks of nature along with the aforementioned mimic, a gelatinous cube, bloodhawks, and the gnoll tribe. The wizard is decently dangerous (MU 8) and has an order of battle/random location for himself personally. That ancient evil king is a spectre in a hidden crypt, not very talkative but a reasonable room guardian. Actually, that talking note is the biggest miss…outside of the mimic, amusingly, nobody inside of Owlbear Hill is much interested in interacting with the PCs helpfully. Although the evil wizard can use the hill’s magical Video/PA system to mock them. Now if Speak With Animals is an option, there’s a lot more to do, with a bunch of pitiful “unsuccessful” hybrids wandering sadly around. Plus you could talk to the very valuable owlbear chickcubs.
  Those baby owlbears? Two of them, helpless, worth 5,000gp. Love that. The owlbear cave in general manages to avoid the Bear Cave Problem, which is that natural animal lairs tend to be loot-poor for their danger level. Sure, the big male owlbear sleeps hugging a battered strongbox, but there’s also the chickcubs, an egg to sell, and the juveniles have 11-30 quills that can be either used to buff writing letters, fletching arrows, or be sold to fletchers/scribes for cash. Good loot design. Otherwise you’ve got a couple of big masses of treasure with nasty guardians as the “trick” and of course the party magic user is getting excited about the evil wizard’s spellbook. Nice balance of loot to danger in my opinion.
  I don’t think there’s going to be a lot of difficulty placing this adventure site in most D&D worlds. The gonzo aesthetic is not any stronger than “owlbear” or “landshark” as default setting inhabitants. There’s a me-problem here with gorillas, scorpions, panthers, and spitting vipers all in the same environment but I know players, that won’t bother them in the slightest. They’ll just be very pleased with their delve down on Ol’ Bare Hill.